Wednesday, 4 September 2013

when did we become a generation obsessed with parental guilt ?

when did parents start to loose control of their minds ?, does that sound a bit dramatic ? maybe it is, but the fact is that i am becoming increasingly baffled by the behaviour of many parents in my midst.

i may well get lynched for writing this post, but its something that i have been thinking about increasingly of late. parents seem to be wracked with guilt, beat themselves up for not doing the right thing, or what they perceive to be right.

i am certain that 35 odd years age when my mother picked me up from school , actually come to think of it she didn't very often pick me up from school, it was usually one of my older sisters, mum would have been at work or perhaps doing jobs at home. she would have felt no guilt at not being the one there everyday to pick us up, and as long as someone picked us up i really don't think we were bothered. ditto, sports days and school concerts plays etc, mum or dad never came to sports days, i can't honestly remember anyones being there, maybe the odd couple of grandparents, when it came to plays etc, mum would often be there if her work permitted (which at that time expecting time off to go to a school event would have been virtually unheard of !) when did this all change ?

fast forward and we seem to be living in a society where parents feel that every event needs to be attended by the whole family, mum, dad, grandparents and in some cases aunts and uncles!,
is this the children's expectation ?, perhaps, because they see that all the other children have lots of people to see them, or is it just another example of parental guilt ?, that if you miss something it makes you, less of or a bad parent ?

the two younger girls went back to school yesterday, as i am recovering from an operation at the moment i could not take them for their first day back (and probably will not manage walk them to or pick them up from school until next week), chris took them and freya (13yrs), picked them up as she is not back at school yet. did i feel bad/guilty ?, well, no i didn't actually, i will take and pick up for the rest of the year and don't think in the grand scale of things it really matters, and quite honestly i don't think they were bothered at all.

a was flicking through facebook yesterday, i have an account but must say i don't follow the currant trend of documenting my/my children's lives on there, in fact i don't write on it at all, but do sometimes have a look what other people are doing. there were lots and lots of pictures of children in school uniform going back to school, i was stunned to read a comment from a fellow parent that went something like this, " feel like such a bad one told me you are supposed to take pics on the first day of junior school - oops!", a couple of other parents commented that they weren't there and how unforgivable it was !, another said that her child had to go to breakfast and after school club, as though this was a deadly sin. why are these women feeling like this ?, will their children be scarred by their parents not being their for them to wave them in on the first day?, i don't think so , what do you think ?


Tuesday, 3 September 2013

52 week project 35/52

 'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'.
finn, hebe, clemmie and freya; this makes me laugh

52 week project 34/52

'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'.

the family's annual holiday; this year south wales, gower peninsula, fantastic...

clemmie alexandra; very pretty in the flower crown you made at the botanical gardens

freya elizabeth; den building went down well too

hebe francesca; put so much effort into your den building

finn patrick; you just ran about !

clemmie; loved the beach days

freya; relaxing with a good book


hebe; dig, dig, dig







52 week project 33/52

'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'. 
we spent a lovely couple of hours at the 'family fun day' at the local park. apart from freya and finn who obviously thought themselves too cool for all that...
clemmie alexandra; you spent sooo long making daisy petal eyelashes for you tree pixie


hebe francesca; a crown for your tree pixie


52 week project 32/52

'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'.

we had a glorious day out at malham cove, north yorkshire

 you walked up all these steps to get to the top of the cove.

but were rewarded by this magnificent limestone pavement and the most beautiful views. freya and finn were impressed that 'harry potter and the deathly hollows', contains scenes filmed here.

we came back down past 'janet's foss' waterfall

and through the woods.

52 week project 31/52

'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'.

freya, hebe and clemmie ; 'helping' dad build a teepee in the garden! finn had gone to play football with his friends.


52 week project 30/52

'a portrait of my children once a week, every week, in 2013'.

finn patrick;
hebe francesca;

clemmie alexandra;
freya elizabeth;